Pay it Forward
Back in 2000, a move came out called “Pay It Forward”. I, personally thought it was a great movie, a great concept at the very least. The concept is this: “asking that a good turn be repaid by having it done to others instead.” It’s actually quite simple, however what I would love to see is the first word taken of that. Meaning, what if we did things for others simply because someone did something nice for us?
Whoa, what a concept right? Okay let me break it down with an example. A couple of months ago I was talking to a co-worker/friend of mine regarding a specific situation. In that, she had mentioned that she doesn’t feel like there is really away to help me like I have helped her. Simply put, I showed her how to do a few things, and she didn’t feel like she had anything to show me back. I personally, was expecting nothing in return, that’s not the kind of person that I am. But, in going further into the conversation, she had mentioned that another assistant in the office didn’t know how to do something, so she had spent some time with her to show her. WOW, big AHA for me, the big AHA was this. . . It filled my heart to hear that she had taken time out of her day to help someone else. For me, that was repayment enough for anything that I had helped her with…. I feel like all of my words are jumbling together, and they may even be starting to confuse me!
Let’s go with one more example, you’re leaving a gas station, waiting to make a right turn on to a main street. Someone is kind enough to stop, and leave you room to allow you to enter the road. . . How good does that make you feel? Have you ever noticed, that almost every time, you are soon after given the opportunity to do the same for someone else? Chances are as you are driving the rest of your trip, you will see someone trying to pull out of a parking lot, will you slow down and let them out, or are you going to speed up to be the first in line for that red light?
The point is, when people do something kind for you, you may not have the ability to “repay” them. But you can certainly pass their kindness on to someone else.
What if for one day, EVERY ONE started the day doing something kind for someone else, then on top of that, every one of the people who experienced a kind act, paid it forward? What would that do for our world…just for one day?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vr3x_RRJdd4
Giving without Expectations
I often ponder how we have become a society of people who give to others only if they feel they can get something in return. I believe that giving should be unconditional, with no expectation (there is that word again) of some kind of gain. I think about this often, however, it came up for me again today, and I thought I would blog about it.
Todays experience was this… a professional partner of mine needed access to a home to perform an inspection for one of our buyers, that he was not able to do yesterday as originally planned. When he called me and told me the situation, I told him I would drive out there and meet him and let him in so he could get it taken care of. So on my lunch I schlepped from Tempe to Laveen, and hung out for a bit while he completed his inspection. When we were leaving, he said, “wow, you really went above and beyond. I really owe you now huh?” Although he was somewhat joking, I wondered in my head what his experiences have been with people who have helped him out in the past, and what they had expected in return. I was kind of taken aback, and actually told him that I just do what I do, I don’t need to be owed for anything. All I ask for is a simple thank you (that goes back to my expectation of kindess, and of course good manners.)
I think that giving is a part of a good life (and I want to be clear, when I say giving, I’m not just talking about money or material things, sometimes you just need to give a little of yourself or your time), and I am a total believer in Karma, and what goes around comes around. Therefore, by just helping someone or giving to someone because you truly have the desire to, it will always come back to you at some point in your life. Haven’t you ever noticed that when you are driving, and you decided to be nice and stop and give someone room to pull out of a driveway, at some point that day someone does the same for you?
I also wonder why many people have the need to announce to the world the good that they have done for others. Why, when someone gives $5.00 to a homeless person, or donates to a charity, or stops to help someone change a tire, must they announce to the world that they have done this good thing? I guess my real question is, why isn’t just giving to or helping someone enough, why must we always need more?
If you are keeping a tally of all the things you have done for someone or ways you have helped them, chances are you aren’t doing it for the right reasons. If you only give because you are looking for some kind of reward, whether it be material, to hold it over their head, or even recognition from other people, are you really giving something to someone or are you actually in fact taking from them?
Yeah, those are my thoughts for today. More to come I’m sure!
“To give and not expect anything in return; to give for no special time or season; to give, not for any particular recognition; to give, not for a substantial tax refund; to give for the sake of giving — often just between giver and receiver — has a life of its own — an elevated one.”
—Glaceta Honeyghan
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